Kylee's Tips1. Mini bottles of Vodka are a necessity during the Zombie Apocalypse. Hell-o! It's pretty damn hard to kill a z-bag and hold a fifth! PLUS, those little bottles of liquid courage fit in the pockets of those ridiculous cargo pants Jade will make you wear! (Total fashion faux pas)
2. Large purses are essential. You're going to pick things up almost everywhere you go and while cargo pants are great with the little pockets... you need something to hold the bigger things. Remember, it's the apocalypse, you're not going to be hoisting a 56" flat screen... just food, hygiene products and weapons. LOTS of weapons! 3. Learn to work with others. You're not going to survive the apocalypse alone. You need someone to watch your 6! 4. Music. You need to have it playing in your head as you make your zombie kills. I've always just wanted my own theme music I guess ;) 5. WOMEN... find an adult store and make sure you stock up on batteries! 6. If you here a noise, run! Don't go, 'check it out'... it never ends well in the movies for the person that does. Friendly tip! 7. NEVER, and I repeat never go to the bathroom alone! Those fucking Z-bags have some sort of 'I gotta pee' radar. They will get you when your pants are down... yet another one of those bad looks for EVERYONE! 8. For the love of all that's holy... keep moving! If you become stagnant, you've become food for the dead! Move your ASSES! *Kylee will add more of her survival tips as she figures them out. That's if we can get her to send them in! |
Jade's Tips1. Always make sure you have witty zombie killing remarks planned in advance. (Mine consisted of grunts, and shouting cuss words. That is not witty.)
2. Find a reason to live BEFORE the zombie apocalypse. If you don’t have a reason to go on, you won’t last long. 3. Carry rubber gloves. You can get them from hospitals, pharmacies and even grocery stores. Use them to avoid touching zombie goo and they can also hold water or other liquids you may need. 4. Learn all the words to as many songs as you can. You will be doing a lot of singing in your off time and no one wants to hear you singing the one line you can remember over and over again. 5. Keep a journal. This not only helps your thoughts, but you can document important things you see, addresses, plant descriptions or anything else that may come in handy later. 6. Unless you want a baby in a world full of zombies, stock up on birth control or don’t have sex, period. Really, how hard is it to go find a fucking pharmacy and take a couple years worth of pills. That’s 24 little tiny packets for two years. No excuse. 7. Learn how to shoot. Unlike television or books, when it happens you are not going to miraculously turn into a sharp shooter. Practice with moving targets too, zombies don’t hold still for you. 8. If you travel in car always make sure you have section of hose in the car for siphoning gas. You will run out eventually and all the cars full of gas aren’t going to do you a bit of good if you can’t get it out of those cars. Don’t forget the gas cans either, geniuses. *Jade will add more survival tips as she acquires them. I mean, the girls are still learning and all! |